Why you should never regret a breakup

Being in a relationship with someone is actually a feat within itself; from being open to a relationship, actively looking for someone, meeting lots of people who are not potentials, finding a potential partner, starting to date each other, becoming exclusive to finally being able to let your guard down and have 100% faith that you are both on the same journey together.

Getting to the stage where you are comfortable with each other, plan your future together and can be 100% yourself without worry or judgement, is a very content yet vulnerable place to be. When a relationship ends during this stage, it is heartbreaking and soul destroying because you had let your guard down and then it becomes very difficult to break free from being guarded in future relationships.

While you may be drowning your sorrows on the sofa, with a blanket watching Love Island, or spending hours on the phone going over the details of why it happened with friends, try to remind yourself that, although you cannot see it now through the heartache, the breakup was, in fact, for the best.

Here are 5 reasons why you should never regret a breakup:

1. He/she was not the right one for you

If the relationship ended, it was due to something. Either your partner felt it was not right, the timing was wrong, your paths were different or there was a lack of trust etc. What I mean is that although you may feel the relationship was perfect, clearly it was not. Your partner may have been having doubts, may have been unfaithful or for some reason, felt you were not the one for him – it is better that it ends than to continue feeling it was perfect while your partner was unhappy.

2.You learn something positive from every bad experience

Whether it is that you trust to easily or you are too kind, or whether you just know which kind of people to avoid and who are red flags for you, you will inadvertently learn something from everyone who comes into your life.

3. It was time spent on refining who you want to be with

Maybe you felt your partner was ‘the one’ and was right for you in every way. However, if you take the qualities you loved about that person and focus on them, you can try to view the time in this relationship as having found the right kind of person for you and then you can seek those same qualities in future relationships. Think of all the good times you had and the fun things you did as time you spent discovering what kind of relationship you want.

4. You become more resilient

No one would ever wish to be hurt or left heartbroken but, by going through the grief involved in a breakup, you automatically learn more about yourself and, in time, you see that you can overcome life’s adversities. All grieving takes time, and this can take longer for some but, go with it. Accept the bad days – cry through them and do what it takes for you to feel relief. Then eventually, appreciate the good days as they will become more frequent.

5. The best is yet to come

I truly believe in life that everything gets better as time goes by. It is quite rare that you go from a job or a relationship or a situation where things were so good, to being completely the opposite, because your expectations increase, and you become more aware of what you deserve. Keep the same mantra for relationships – if one ends and that door closes, another one will open and it will lead you to a much more desirable destination than the path you were previously on.

Breakups are hard and they are devastating for a long period of time. But, as time goes by, new opportunities arise, and new people walk in and out of your life. So yes, he/she may have been perfect for you at that time, and yes, he/she may have been the person you saw yourself spending the rest of your life with, but have faith that there is an even more perfect partner out there and the best is definitely yet to come.