Is humility the ultimate display of confidence?

When we think of being humble, we think of the shy, quiet people who do everything for others and not much for themselves. Very rarely is it seen as a quality to admire. However, when we think of confidence, this is something we would all love to have. Little do many know that when humility and confidence work in synergy, the people that display these traits are empowered and fulfilled, without a need for external appreciation.

In a world where people are constantly seeking approval and attention on social media, is there a place for the humble? Are these people the ones we never hear from or the ones we never see posting? We all have friends or family who live their lives on social media and post about every day activities while we wonder if their friends really want to see their school run or their trip to the gym? Does anyone really want to know what they ate for breakfast or see a picture of their dog walk? We all have the friends who get their sense of approval from the number of likes, comments or shares they receive. The thing is that not all posting on social media is attention seeking, and some of these people may, in fact, be the humblest. Let me explain…

It could also be that the poster’s humility lies in the message of what they are posting and that others around the world are finding education, inspiration, motivation or a sense of community from these posts. This is the key. Each of us have a WHY and if you do not know yours, I invite you to think about it and what your purpose is on this planet? Is it to help others? It could be to be kind or happy or to be the best mum/wife/husband/son that you can be. It could be for a greater purpose like educating others about body acceptance or veganism. Once you discover your WHY, you need to live your life every day in alignment to those values. The things you do and your everyday actions that align will make you feel good, and the things that do not align, will bring about negative thoughts and emotions.

So, if your why is to be part of a group of people who commonly promote animal welfare or health and fitness, then the posts about your daily trip to the gym or your vegan meals actually contribute to your WHY and your purpose in life. If your WHY is to be the best mum you possibly can, then the school run and the trip to the soft play align with this and make you feel good. At this point, it does not matter one little bit what others think about your posts.

Although social media is the perfect platform for the attention seekers and the people with low self-esteem and over confidence, it is actually also a place where people can convey their message to the world. Many people do not find others with similar interests within their circles, either due to geographical limitations, reduced mobility or an interest in less popular trends. We can find groups and like-minded people on social media who can support us through tough times, help us recover from illness, motivate us to lose weight or simply make us feel part of something bigger when we have felt alone in our lives.

The humility lies in the fact that the humble gain their self-actualisation and confidence through inner validation and the only person they want to impress is themselves. The truly confident person does not seek validation through external forces or the number of likes they receive on a post; they are doing what they are doing because it makes them feel good, without care for the reactions of the naysayers.

So, when we see the posts about the morning coffee or the family walk, we need to remember that as much as that may not be of interest to us, that person may be inspiring others in their online community to do something bigger than it appears, and it may be just what other people need to see that day.

Ultimately, humility is judged by our actions, not snippets of our life on social media, and if we are acting in complete alignment to our values, and our actions match our words, humility comes naturally because we do not require other people’s approval. Actions do speak louder than words, so while you have been wondering why the person who posts their morning coffee or their car journey to work is seeking so attention from mundane activities, he/she could actually be communicating their purpose to a larger audience. The balance of confidence and humility in synergy creates a person who can carry their message to others and live their purpose in bliss.

Next time you post on social media, ask yourself ‘Who is this for and who am I trying to impress?’ If the answer is simply yourself, then you are very likely one of these people.